Time to dive into What I Want, part three in my series on Fierce Free and Full of Fire: The Guide to Being Glorious You by Jen Hatmaker. If you missed my previous posts, here is part 1, Who I Am and part 2, What I Need. The What I Want section really got my mind spinning in a million different directions. Amidst the everyday responsibilities of being a wife, mother, daughter, sister, friend, etc., it seems insane to add one more thing to the list. But dreams are not meant to be ignored and shoved in the closet. Let’s think about bringing them into the light of day.
I Want This Dream
Do you have a dream? Any dream? Big or small? Do you talk about it? Do you give it life?
“If you have a secret dream, a private desire, and you are refusing to bring it into the light of day, we actually need you… There is an empty void right where your talent belongs. Literally nobody else can do what you do in the way you do it.”(Jen Hatmaker)
This is where we all throw the idea of scarcity out the window. Your dream has not already been done by someone else. Because it is yours! And there is enough room in this world for an unlimited number of dreams and ideas. The only thing your dream needs is for YOU to decide that YOU WANT to bring it to life. It’s ok if you are not ready to jump in with both feet, just don’t use scarcity as the excuse.
This line resonated with me and it may be your reason for putting on the brakes as well:
“Or maybe it’s just that so many people live in your home, adding a new things feels somewhere between hilarious and psychotic.” (Jen Hatmaker)
Are you nodding your head? I know, me too! We’re going to come back to this one, let’s get back to the dreams in question.
When, not if, you decide to bring your dream out into the light and give it a name, you need to protect it. The people in your life may have all sorts of reactions, opinions, and input. But please remember:
“It isn’t theirs to reject. It belongs to you, and you are its mother and father, its doting aunt and closest sister, its bodyguard and lead blocker. Protect it in its undeveloped infant stage; who else will?” (Jen Hatmaker)
We do not need permission to create, to follow our dreams. It is our dream and we can choose to do the work, put in the effort, and bring it to life. Will every dream make you a million dollars – NO. Is your only mission in creating to make a million dollars? Or do you have other motivation for this dream in your heart? Do you want to learn new things and bring your passion into reality? That is enough reason right there. It is your time, energy, and hard labor – you get to decide where it is spent. Which brings us to the next chapter – choosing your yeses.
I Want to Choose My Yeses
Everything we do is a series of choices that require us to decide yes or no. Yes we want to make this choice and go in this direction or no we do not. And after that first yes comes another choice. The cycle continues to go forever and ever into eternity. I agree it is just exhausting! Can’t we just jump to the finale, the balloons and streamers where everything comes together and is exactly as we planned it to be? This is why so many dreams stay in our heart and never see the light of day. We get stuck because it all seems so HARD.
If you are living in the land where adding one more things seems psychotic, I see you. I AM you! But we all still have the option to choose our yeses. We just have to also remember:
“Each of us has a limited amount of time and energy, and it will reach its capacity. Choosing new yeses means a few new nos too. We subtract so we can add.” (Jen Hatmaker)
Discovering our true capacity and energy levels may be harder for some of us than for others. I HATE to say no to people. I feel awful every time the word exits my lips. But overloading my schedule does not really help anyone. It definitely does not leave any room for a new dream that is poking at my soul.
“You have agency over your choices. If you are saying yes when you want to say no, the only person who can reverse this is you.” (Jen Hatmaker)
We all just need to be honest. People appreciate honesty. Though my internal guilt says this person will never talk to me again if I say no, most likely the response will be “I appreciate your honesty, maybe next time”. This goes for more than adding new dreams to the mix, it also goes for regular old wife/mother/sister/daughter/friend life. Limit your yeses so that you can give your best self, full of energy to the people you love; not the overwhelmed, over scheduled, exhausted shadow of you. Choose your YES wisely.
The What I Want section of Fierce Free and Full of Fire is full of SO MUCH MORE than I touched on here. Jen filled these chapters will so much truth you need to explore for yourself. We are almost to launch day. This glorious book baby is released to the world on April 21st. Click here to order your copy today. For now, take a moment and listen to your heart – Do you have a dream? Sit quiet; your heart will have an answer. The next YES is up to you.